Unfettered - Francis of Assisi

“I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full.” John 10:10

From the USA Today:
“Todd Marinovich was born on the Fourth of July and programmed to be a great quarterback. His father Marv, a former Oakland Raiders offensive lineman and assistant coach, drilled him from infancy with NFL stardom as the goal. For a while, Todd responded. The 1987 All-USA Offensive Player of the Year racked up a national-record 9,194 passing yards High School. His decision to play college ball at Southern California was preordained: his dad was co-captain of USC's 1962 national champion.

Marinovich led the Trojans to the Rose Bowl as a redshirt freshman, but by his sophomore year, there were bugs in the program. The young man who never had touched a Big Mac or watched cartoons was arrested on drug charges and suspended from the team twice. Marv Marinovich said at the time that his son's problems were just part of growing up and "Todd will come back with a vengeance."

Marinovich would have many downfalls and attempted comebacks in the ensuing years. He left USC, entered the 1991 NFL draft and was a first-round pick of the Raiders. He signed a $2.27 million, three-year contract, became a starter in his rookie year and played in one postseason game. His continuing drug problems ended his NFL career the next season. He has since bounced around the Canadian Football League and, most recently, the Arena League. He spent 90 days in an Orange County, Calif., jail in 1998 for a marijuana cultivation conviction and was arrested a year ago after Los Angeles police found heroin in a car he was driving. He was placed on probation but violated the terms and was ordered into a drug treatment program.”

So what happened? How could this guy be destined for stardom and yet fall so hard? He couldn’t live up to his dad’s expectations of him. He faltered in the face of the overwhelming pressures of living up to his father’s wishes.

And though his situation was extreme, we need to understand that our parents have expectations and desires for our lives. Most of them probably want you to experience the middle class suburbia life—a husband or wife, 2 kids, 2 car garage, shed for the riding lawn mower, a porch swing, etc. In other words, your parents want what they think is best for your life. They don’t wish harm on you. They equate a comfortable and successful life with the best thing for you.

Luke 9:57-62 contains some expectations, both from family and from Jesus:

As they were walking along the road, a man said to him, “I will follow you wherever you go.”
Jesus replied, “Foxes have holes and birds of the air have nests, but the Son of Man has no place to lay his head.
He said to another man, “Follow me.” But the man replied, “Lord, first let me go and bury my father.”
Jesus said to him, “Let the dead bury their own dead, but you go and proclaim the kingdom of God.”
Still another said, “I will follow you, Lord; but first let me go back and say good-by to my family.”
Jesus replied, “No one who puts his hand to the plow and looks back is fit for service in the kingdom of God.”

Jesus expects people to follow his leading regardless of their situation in life. But the people may not be ready. The second man had to bury his father. There is no indication that his father necessarily was dead. What he means is that he can’t leave and quit his job in the family business until the father does die. He is expected to stay home. The third man felt obligated to go back and explain things with his family. He was torn between Jesus’ calling and his families expectations, and as a result his path was wavering.

So here’s the big question—At what point does it become faithful to go away from your parents’ expectations? When should you tell your parents, “I love you, but I can’t live up to the life you have envisioned for me?”
Though your parents want what is best for you, their idea of “best” may be different than “best for the kingdom.” God may have other plans for you. Parents want us to contribute to society. We think that we accomplish this concept by being good citizens, voting, helping out the economy, having a nice family, etc. But God doesn’t want us just to contribute to society. God wants us to change it and improve it.

There once was a guy named Francis of Assisi. Francis was born in Italy into a family of moderate wealth and grew up in a comfortable lifestyle. He spent all the money he had. He enjoyed the romantic adventures of a young nobleman. He was kind and considerate and faithful to the church, but for the most part he pursued his own pleasure and thought little of the needs of others. He was living the life that was expected of him.
This lifestyle began to change through a long and odd series of events. For one thing, he was captured during a brief battle between the cities of Perugia and Assisi. While a prisoner he endured a long sickness and when he recovered he was a much more serious person. Soon after this, while on his way to participate in the wars of Southern Italy, he received a vision calling him to “serve the Master rather than the man
His first major ministry came after he received a vision which he understood to be calling him to a ministry of rebuilding churches. His first attempt was to take goods from his father’s warehouse and sell them to pay for the repairs of a local church. He also asked the priest if he could stay and live at the church. His father did not appreciate being robbed or his son’s new home. In response, he found Francis and beat him and chained him up, even though Francis was twenty-five years old at the time. Francis was released and returned to the church. His father came again, confronted him and told him to come home or renounce his inheritance. Francis decided that he would rather serve God than be wealthy, and he gave up all that he had from his father. He even took off the clothes he was wearing since even they had come from his father’s money. Fortunately one of the church workers present gave him something to wear.

Talk about dropping your nets. Here is Francis dropping a huge net—his parents expectations. A life of luxury. All just to serve. Will that be the life for all of us? No. But we should at least consider what God might be calling us to. There is a difficult tension of your parents wanting you to live a good life, but perhaps God calling you to something different. Understand that you are not bound by the way your parents have lived out their faiths. You may be called to live your faith a different way. God may be calling you to drop the net of your parent’s expectations so that you can follow Him unfettered and without looking back.